Godly Choices

Life is full of choices. Every day, from the minute we wake up, to the minute we go to sleep, we're making choices, one after another.

Not all choices have bad consequences and not all choices have good consequences. For instance; we choose to get up out of bed and brush our teeth, do our hair, put a little make-up on (sometimes...if you're not a mom who has forgotten what it was like to even go to the bathroom alone, lol).

There aren't good or bad consequences to getting out of bed in the morning.

But there are choices in life that affect us in good and bad ways. Like, we could choose to drive our car too fast, causing a wreck or for someone to get injured.

There are choices we make every day that are very important to our lives and it's always a good thing to keep in the back of our minds this question: How will this choice that I'm making affect my life and the people around me? Our choices constantly affect others.

I've found that out the hard way. It breaks my heart and frustrates me to no end to know that a lot of my more recent choices have hurt some people, caused sleepless nights, tears and frustration.

Our choices affect US.

I think for us women, we tend to make choices flippantly, due to our emotions being on a never-ending high from hormones and who knows what else. We speak things, we think things, we do things that cause hurt to ourselves and to others. I'm talking to myself here, just as much as I am to whoever is reading this. I am constantly spouting my little mouth off, with whatever I am thinking at the moment. I often just run my thoughts and actions around before even pausing to think about the consequences of what I'm saying/doing. I let my excitement, frustration, anger, (whatever the "thing" may be at the time) just get ahead of me. So I am trying to teach myself to stop.

STOP and THINK. Think slowly. Think from others perspectives. Put myself in their shoes. Think with love and kindness. And I'm learning to *try* and never spout my mouth off in anger, ever. Because when I do that, I never, ever do it with love. I never pause to think of how my words are affecting others.

Our choices are important! What we say, do, think and act like can and will affect us, and those around us. So make godly choices. Try to slow down and not allow emotions and feelings get in the way of reality. And when there is a reason to be angry, don't go to bed on it. Deal with it. But do it in love, gentleness and kindness. God will bless you and He will help you with future choices. Also, don't beat yourself up when you do fail. We're human. But make every effort, when you do fail, to ask for forgiveness, make things right and choose again, to love.

Living with Guilt

There have been several situations in my life where I've been accused of things that I didn't say or do. It's happened over and over; but who hasn't had those situations?

Sometimes I've found myself wallowing in frustration, despair and even anger, because of some of the accusations against me. I find myself wanting to make sure everyone is aware of my innocence. I find myself very defensive and trying to make my image look good; to clear my name.

Sometimes people don't want to hear the truth. Sometimes they just refuse to even try to hear the truth. They believe what they believe and just won't have anything to do with actual facts. To them, knowing the truth isn't important. Sometimes, I think if they knew the truth, then their image would be tarnished and they don't want that...and they know that if they accept the truth, then they'd be admitting to a mistake on their part.

It can be frustrating, right? When you know you've done nothing wrong and the person is refusing to hear the truth?

Well, I have at least 2 situations in my life right now that are like that. I have people believing things about me that are just not true. But something I came to grips with a few months ago and that I have to keep reminding myself of is this:

1. One day the truth really will be known, whether it's here on earth, or when they face God in heaven.

2. God knows the truth and that is all that really matters.

3. I have done everything I can do make things work...to love the other person(s) and for the things I did do wrong, to make them right. (Apologizing and promising to be different).


When a person refuses to forgive, or let the other person move on, it's a loss for them. I have had to learn to not live with guilt. In one of these situations, I DID do something wrong...I said some things that were not godly, that were not thoughtful, and were mean and ugly. When I realized where I went astray, I tried apologizing and making things right with the person I wronged. But the apology (from what I can tell) was not taken well at all.

I often sit around trying to figure out what else I did, or feeling guilty for what I did wrong. Often the guilt drives me crazy, because I feel like I messed up a relationship that could have been completely awesome. I feel guilty over and over and over again. I have literally let it drive a wedge between my husband and I at times. I have let the guilt and frustration take over.

But the other day, when I was praying about the whole situation, God reminded me that HE forgave me. That I had come to Him, asked His forgiveness and had done everything in my power to make things right. He reminded me that what was important was the forgiveness I had received from HIM. I was so thankful for that reminder, because what matters is that I'm right with God...not humans. It's good to find forgiveness with the humans in your life; not saying that we shouldn't seek forgiveness from the people we wrong. We should, most assuredly. But seeking God's forgiveness and love is what counts.

God told me that to live with the guilt after asking for His forgiveness is to live as if His forgiveness meant nothing to me.

So when you do something wrong, make sure you make it right with the person you wronged. Ask for God's forgiveness. Then move on! Even if the other person doesn't choose to forgive, you can live with freedom of conscience, know you've done the right thing and that God is pleased with you.

Choosing Joy

Lately my life has been, lets say, challenging. Things seem to just keep happening that cause stress in my family's everyday life. It's been one thing after another.

This past week alone has held a serious eye injury for me, a car wreck that my husband was in, a loss of a job, our rent paycheck bouncing because our bank decided to take a gas charge out that had been charged over a month ago (for some reason it "slipped thru the cracks" and didn't actually post; we learned our lesson. Document every single charge we make on our debit card so we know exactly what we have in the bank). Then another bill saying we owed literally 5x the amount that was really due. Yeah, we did finally get it fixed, but only after spending literally 4 hours on the phone with the company, plus lots of stress and frustration. Then another bill from our apartment complex, saying we owed fees for something that we don't owe. Then, even small things like breaking a glass on the carpet, shattering small shards everywhere... I have two small children who play on this floor all day, every day. Yes, I was a panicked mother. Then my hubby's last pair of good jeans getting a huge rip on them.  And then on top of all of that, my two year old son has had a fever for the past 3 days, and my 8 month old daughter has decided that she is a night owl and refuses to sleep at night. In fact, right now she is fussing, in her swing. It's 12:28 am...she still hasn't slept at all tonight. LOL

So there is my past week in a nutshell. My life has been like this; maybe not quite as intense like this past week, but I don't think I'd be exaggerating to say that it's been crazy like this for at least 2 years now. Literally.

So often I want to crumble. I want to just break down in tears, and sometimes I do! Sometimes I just wanna go bury my head in the sand and imagine that the world doesn't exist. Sometimes I dream of going to sit on some beach somewhere, way far away, with just my small family (or maybe just my hubby? Grandparents can babysit the kids, right?) . I want a sun-hat, a beach umbrella, some suntan lotion, a towel and a good, good book. Maybe that Ina May Gaskin birthing book I've been wanting to read for almost 3 years now. I'd like to have a huge jug full of ice cold lemonade with those pretty little umbrella "toothpicks" they put in drinks sometimes. And maybe a good long nap. Like a nap that lasts a week. :)

But then again, time and money for that doesn't exist. So what do I do? What are my options? My brain often thinks about this. My options are few, but at least that keeps my tired brain from having to think too much about what I should do. Here are my choices:

1) Crumble. Have no faith in God. Get angry. Turn inward. Give up.

2) Choose joy. Choose faith in a God who never lets me down. Be peaceful. (let me just say here; I'm no angel when it comes to any of this. Trust me. Or ask my poor hubby who has to deal with my mini break melt downs.) Keep going and best of all; find positive in everything. Also, when and where you can, encourage others.

Now, for me, I have made both of those choices. The first one is real easy to "choose." That is the more natural one for me. It's really easy for me to just give up. But when I find myself stooping to those low choices, either my hubby, or one of my parents, or a friend will remind me to snap out of it and choose the life of Love, Joy and Peace.  It's challenging, no doubt. But I'd rather challenge myself to be a follower of Jesus, than fall into self-pity and faithlessness.

Jesus never said this life would be easy. He never said we wouldn't have obstacles. He never said we wouldn't cry, or have problems. But what He did promise is that He would be faithful to walk beside us, to encourage us, and even carry us when we can't put our foot in front of the other. He is faithful. He loves us and He will never cease to amaze me with His awesomeness.

Ok, so now that I told a lot of negative, I want to share what God did to bless me, and to prove to me His never failing love and blessings!

First off, He provided a free ticket for me to be able to attend the PINK Impact 2013 that my church is preparing for April.
My husband got accepted into college with the full amount of financial aid provided!
With a bill that we "owed" 5x the real amount; God worked it out where our account ended up being credited over $100 towards our next bill!!!! So our next bill is already taken care of. Amazing, right?

Anyways...God is good. He will bless those who put their trust in Him. So keep trusting. Keep following. Keep loving. Never, ever give up!