Remind Yourself of His Faithfulness

Have you ever been in the middle of a situation where you feel that God isn't listening, or that He doesn't care, or that He's abandoned you?

We all have times in our lives that we go through something that is stressful, hurtful, scary, etc. I was sharing with a friend the other day some of the events of our year and as I spoke about them, I suddenly realized how time after time, even tho I was recounting events that were extremely stressful at the time, I was also recounting time after time of God's faithfulness and Him bringing us through them.

One specific time stood out to me, as unusual as it may seem. My son broke his leg earlier this year by "supermanning" himself off the stop of our couch and landing with a thud on his femur, snapping it into two. Of course, we spent some time at the hospital and that night, instead of sending us home, they decided to keep him overnight for observation and to teach us how to take care of his cast. My husband decided to stay there with him and let me go home with our daughter. As I was driving home, my old van started to overheat. The needle kept inching its way up until it was a hairline away from the bright red mark. I was in a very bad area of town, at 2 am with my little baby daughter in the backseat.

I began to pray as I saw the needle inching its way up, but once it reached that red mark, I said, "God, I need You to send an Angel here, now, to blow on this engine, because I'm not stopping here. You know how dangerous it is here and if I stop, we'll be in great danger. I'm believing in You and I know You want me to make it home safe."

Sure enough, as I prayed, the needle started going down and I was able to make it home safely. Each time the needle went up, I would pray and it would go back down, immediately.

As I shared this story with my friend, she commented, "I really like how you just told God what you needed and knew He would take care of you."

It dawned on me that I really did believe He would help me and I didn't doubt His goodness in the middle of the struggle. I never realized that at the time. And since then, I have gone through several other times where the stress has become overwhelming and when I'd pray, peace would overcome me. As I look back and see times that the peace didn't overcome me, I realize that I didn't believe in Him. I didn't trust Him to carry me fully through that situation.

Sometimes life doesn't go as planned, and when we're in the middle of the struggle, it's good to remind ourselves of the times we know God carried us through. It'll remind us that whatever we're going through right now is also known by God and He will take care of us. And if you go through times when you're so stressed you find yourself questioning God and His faithfulness, sit down and close your eyes. Think back to the times you know He was faithful. Write them down. Recount them to a friend.

Something I am going to do, and suggest to you too, is to have a "Remember His Faithfulness" jar. Write down on small pieces of paper things God has done for you. Then fold them up nicely, drop them in the jar and when you feel down, discouraged and defeated, pull out a piece of paper and read it. It'll encourage you. It'll remind you that He never, ever, ever fails!

Using Prayer as Your Weapon

Yesterday I took some time to go to the poolside and read a book. One of my favorite series is Frank Peretti's "This Present Darkness" and "Piercing the Darkness."  (PS. I am not endorsing all the things in that book, nor any of his other books, but I do find those particular two very challenging to my faith and encouraging.)

As I read a chapter in Piercing the Darkness, I found myself reading with a new perspective. The chapter I was reading was talking about a father whose wife had passed away and he had prayed over a little girl who he believed had demons influencing her actions and words in school. (He was a school teacher at a Christian school). Later on, the mother of the girl found out about it, took it as abuse and turned him in. Subsequently, his two children were removed from his home and were placed in foster care by CPS. During his legal battle with this situation, he ran into several forces against him. Demonic forces. Forces that were hard to reckon with; actually impossible to reckon with, except for the power of prayer. As time went on, he realized when his prayer life slipped, the battle began to be lost. This wasn't simple prayer, like just praying a small, "Lord, please help me today and help my children to get to come back to me soon." The type of prayer this took was a literal battle.

This part in the book struck really close to home as I have had CPS investigate my home and my children and myself, when my 2 1/2 year old son broke his leg. My son was just being a boy and did what I like to call "Supermanned" himself off the very top of our couch onto the floor. He landed just right, where it snapped his femur in two. We called 911 and they came to transfer him to the nearest hospital where police and CPS were waiting for us. I was completely taken back, because I love my kids. I had no clue his broken bone was going to lead us down this path. Later, we found out it was just protocol for a hospital to call CPS and police if a child has a broken bone and they're under the age of 5 years old. We got transferred to a Children's Hospital that specialized in setting children's broken bones and the doctors and nurses were very reassuring to us, while CPS swarmed around us, hounded us with questions and grilled us with confusing paperwork, etc. The mother in me was screaming inside, "I'm a good mom! I never intended on this happening! Why am I being called out for abuse when I have never laid a hand on my children!" Oh the heartache!

While we were in the hospital with our son, we saw two other small children under the age of 4 come in with the same type of break. That was somewhat relieving to know that our child wasn't a rare case! The doctor told us that a child can break a femur by just twisting the ankle "just right" or shall we say "just wrong" and fall and it could cause the bone to break. Scary!

I say all this to come back to prayer.

I found myself praying non-stop, literally battling in prayer, asking, begging, pleading with God to help us. As CPS continued to talk to us, I could see some concerns, and I could see some relief. It varied from moment to moment. I knew several other people were battling in prayer with us, and I knew that we needed every single prayer and kept asking people to keep praying.

Sometimes it takes a desperate situation to realize that prayer is really our biggest weapon against the enemy. Prayer can be tiring! At least I found it was, while I was in the middle of this battle. I was already tired from the emotional stress of the whole ordeal, people constantly talking to me, asking me questions, my little man just crying in pain, my daughter being fussy, driving late at night and getting lost in a not so good area of town, etc, etc, etc. When did I have time to pray? But I found that prayer was my best friend. I felt calm, collected, clear minded when I prayed. I felt the forces against us moving back the more I prayed. It was a challenge! But it was worth it. Totally worth it.

So when you find yourself in that desperate situation, realize; hey, I've got forces out against me. But I have so many other forces here WITH me. Be willing to fight. Pray. Pray. Pray. Never stop praying. Give 100% and thensome. And just don't stop.

I like to imagine it like this...There is the black side, just rumbling, tumbling, boiling with demons, all trying to grab at me, speak words of discouragement and fear into my heart. They're all waiting for a chance to get at me, hurt me, accuse me, destroy me, and pull me into their black, despairing hole. Then I see myself, with the beautiful, strong angels standing next to me, and Jesus looking down, smiling, whispering words of peace, love, joy, hope, LIFE, and encouragement. When I start to give in to listening to the black side, they start advancing on me...coming closer and closer, tearing at my heart and mind. But as soon as I start praying, there is an invisible wall that is built up around me, and they can only come so close and bounce off that wall, like a ball bounces when you throw it.

Prayer is a powerful, powerful weapon; it's a gift Jesus has given us. So take advantage of it. Embrace prayer. It'll change your life and keep you safe.

Take Time for Yourself

How many times do we sit down to write out a "to-do" list? How many times to we make mental "to-do" lists?

Probably hundreds of times!

We, as women, are so often in the mode of taking care of others and practically forgetting about ourselves. Then at the end of the day, we're exhausted, tired, and just want to fall into bed...just to do it all over again the next day. We rarely sit down to think about what we need, what we want and how to squish ourselves into our daily lives.

I know, this sounds selfish. At least for me it does! I grew up believing that I should always, always put others first and if I had time for myself, then I could do something, but I should also consider all the other things I could be doing for friends or family. And I'd send myself on guilt trips for all the things I could have done, if I chose to sit down and enjoy a book, or sew something for myself, etc.

Being a servant for others is great! It's what Jesus commands us to do, and it's what we really are here on earth for. Our focus should be on loving others, serving them, whether it's within our own homes, or out of the home. If you work, the focus should be on your customers and co-workers around you. Make sure they get to take their breaks, and feel loved. If you're a stay-at-home mom, then your focus should be on keeping a clean house, loving on your kids, and doing things to make your husband feel welcomed when he is home.

But there does come a time where you need to take some time for yourself. Jesus did that! He took 40 days out in the desert to sleep and eat, and pray. It's very important to know the difference between being selfish with "your time" and needing "your time."

I found all  this out earlier this week. I am a person to go and go and go...and go. For the past few years of my life, even before I was married, I never really figured out how to take time for myself. I always felt like I was being selfish when I'd say no to someone needing help, or not accomplish that pile of laundry, or left the dishes in the sink, or didn't dust those shelves, or didn't take a meal to that person, etc, etc. But earlier this week, I had what I'd call my first mental breakdown. I got so stressed, overwhelmed, tired and frustrated that I told my hubby I was going out and just walked out of the house. I took my phone with me and found myself wandering out by the pool/veranda area. It was beautiful! Flowers were everywhere, the breeze was perfect, even tho it was quite warm outside. It was quiet. There wasn't a soul in sight. I sat down on a chair and just allowed my eyes to drift around and take in the beauty around me. I pulled my phone out and played a game, then I pulled up the Kindle app on my phone and started reading one of my favorite books. Hour after hour passed. With each hour, I felt a renewed sense within my being. I soaked in the sun. I felt the stress leaving my body. The tension drained out like the tide going out to sea. It felt reallyyyyyy good. It felt like I'd gone on a mini vacation.

 After reading for a little while, I recline the chair back, stretched my legs out and closed my eyes and prayed. I told God all my problems, fears and doubts. I even told Him I felt bad for leaving my hubby in the house alone with the kids so I could take time for myself. Even with all the relaxation, I still had a shred of guilt weighing me down for being so "selfish" for taking time for myself.

But then His quiet Voice reassured me that I was doing the right thing. He reminded me about His time in the desert and how even He needed time alone, to rest and pray. He reminded me of how He came to earth to leave us an example. He didn't live on earth just to preform miracles and serve people. He came to earth to show us an acceptable and perfect way to live our lives.

When I heard His reassuring Voice, reminding me of all that, I felt the last bit of guilt wash away.

So I am saying all this to remind you: take time for yourself. You can't live to the full potential unless you take some time to renew your mind, refresh your soul and even do something to bless yourself. It's good and fine to do that. Once you get into the habit of taking time for yourself, it might be tempting to do it wayyy more often than you should! But don't let that deter you from taking time for yourself! Serve your family, take care of your responsibilities, but also take that time to be alone and relax.

Beauty in Modesty

Yesterday, my family and I decided to go to the pool. I have several swim outfits I've accumulated over the last few years. 

I was raised to be modest. Growing up, I wore a neck to ankles dress, shorts underneath and well, it'll suffice to say, we were fully covered. I'm not complaining; simply explaining how I was raised. In fact, no matter the struggles and confusion I have had after leaving the community I was raised in, I am still very thankful that my parents did what they thought, at the time, was best. (Later on, they realized it wasn't the best place for me, or them, so they left, me following close behind). Because of my time there, I learned more about crafts, community and how to serve, something that I could never have learned anywhere else.

Anyways, I also learned about modesty. It's been a cause of great struggle and admittedly, a cause of rebellion once I left. I didn't know what I believed, how I felt about modesty or how I should dress. I went through a time where I was fascinated with lower cut shirts, bikinis, etc. 

But as I went to put on my swim outfits, I'd look at myself in the mirror with my bikinis on and felt horrible. I dug around my drawers and found the modest swim skirt my mom gave me and then I found a tankini that a lady gave me that is maternity (I'm pregnant!). So I put it on. The colors weren't "my colors" but you know what? I felt beautiful! I felt good. I felt free. 

My husband saw me and grinned ear to ear. He even told me I was beautiful. 

Being modest in our dress can give us a sense of freedom, and be beautiful in that freedom. 

Modest is Hottest!!!